Context: The following is a challenge to those of us who call ourselves Christians. I yearn to see a change in how we interact with fellow humans regardless of their beliefs or theological stance. I wrote this from a place of wanting to address the way I see us shredding one another (particularly online).
However, I want to be clear: some of what I wrote here would not apply to how you would handle actual abuse (whether physical, mental, spiritual, or emotional). In those cases, you may need to bring in law enforcement and church elders or—at the very least—establish strong boundaries to protect and remove yourself from the situation (take this from someone who has had to do the latter in a visceral way over the past two years).
This note is to make the distinction clear: the following was written to talk about how we interact with someone who we disagree with, posts things online we don’t like, or behaves towards us in any negative way. The following is NOT intended as a way to address truly abusive situations.
If you don’t see people as image-bearers of God first, every interaction you have with them will be tainted.
I wrestle with this daily. When my kids annoy me or my husband and I have a disagreement, I have to consciously choose to see them how God sees them instead of only viewing them through the lens of how they may be affecting me in those moments.
And it extends to human interactions outside my home. When someone cuts me off in traffic. When the barista gets my order wrong at the coffee shop. When a person leaves a snarky, disparaging online comment on something I’ve poured my heart into. When I see someone posting harmful, divisive content on social media. My gut reaction is to snap back, defend myself, put them in their place (i.e., beneath me). And yet, every time I’ve done this, it further widens the rifts caused and leaves everyone throbbing from being pummeled by my pride.
That’s not to say we don’t hold each other accountable or call one another into deeper holiness or communicate about how someone’s actions may be harmful and need to stop. As members of the body of Christ, we are unquestionably called to do this. But we do it differently; not like the world does or even in the ways that may feel “natural” to us.
We do it by attempting the impossible: seeing other people through the eyes of God.